|
When this book arrived in my mailbox, I initially thought it was the long
overdue stoner's reply to drinking games. After all, a quick search of
Amazon.com yields twenty-two books on drinking games yet none on
pot-smoking games, so this seemed like a natural niche to cash in on.
However, this is not what Joint Smoking Rules is about. Instead,
the book is a list of actual rules for stoner etiquette. Why on earth
someone felt the need to lay out rules for an inherently illegal activity
is beyond me, but that's exactly what Worman (accompanied by illustrations
from Carmen Cerra) has done. Maybe it was one of those things that seemed
good at the time...
What do these rules consist of, you ask? On the whole, they seem to fall
into three categories. The first of these seeks to conserve cannabis.
This category includes the Air Freshener Rule, which states that you should
not leave a joint burning unless it is currently being toked. The
suggested penalty depends on the size of your stash, although severe
beatings seem to be permissible. In a similar vein, the Letting a Joint Go
Out Rule implies that those who aren't paying enough attention should be
cut off indefinitely. The second category can be loosely described as
aimed towards getting blasted out of your gourd. Here, we find the If You
Rolled It Rule, which indicates that if you rolled a joint, you must smoke
it. Worman appears quite adamant about this since he notes that there are
no exceptions to this rule. He even italicizes it, so you know he's
serious. Other examples include the Road Trip Rule (which states that if
you are going to a concert or to buy concert tickets, you must smoke
continuously) and the Burn One With Your Supplier Rule (self-explanatory).
Finally, we enter the What In The Hell category, where we find suggestions
that seem designed to melt our addled minds. The prime example of this is
the Cruisin' Rule, which states that the joint should be passed
counter-clockwise in the car. Ignoring the obvious stupidity of driving
while smoking weed, chances are that if it's worth smoking while driving
you'll never be able to remember which was is counter-clockwise.
In addition to the rules, the book contains a glossary which I found far
more entertaining than the actual rules. For example, Muggles is the
plural of Miggle, which is slang for a joint. Gives Harry Potter a
whole new dimension, doesn't it? Although he doesn't include my own
personal slang for marijuana (Monkey, although it should be pronounced as
"Monkay", much as you would say it if you were a stoned chimp), I did learn that
Righteous Bush was a term used in the mid-1940s.
In any case, we've now established that rules laid forth make as much
sense as the idea of codifying norms for breaking the law. But is it
funny? I guess that depends on how closely you've followed the rules. If
you're baked, then yes, it's probably damn funny (as is everything else).
If you're not, then this is more of a head-scratcher than a belly-buster.
-- Ron Davies
|
