Cigarbox Planetarium Due to a snafu, we never reviewed Cigarbox Planetarium's debut. We're working on it. In the meantime, why not visit their website, their label or buy Cigarbox Planetarium stuff at Insound?

Right now, with no advance notice, and for reasons we're not going to bother explaining, you must get rid of one album from your record collection. Which title gets the chop?

Deanna Pineda: The Time/Life Instrumental Favorites Collection of Ray Conniff, so that I may be saved from myself (I was beginning to develop an appreciation for it).

You wake up one morning and discover that you've grown two feet taller overnight. How does it affect your life?

Deanna Pineda: I am now able to ride the rollercoasters at most theme parks.

What three things must a town or city have in order for you to be able to live happily there?

Deanna Pineda: 1) Ethiopian restaurant. 2) Indian restaurant. 3) Thai restaurant.

What's more important: good music or good food? And why?

Deanna Pineda: Good music is more important, because there is plenty of good food and bad music already.

Would you rather be anal probed by aliens or have a root canal without anaesthetics? Explain your choice.

Deanna Pineda: Being anal probed by aliens is preferable to a root canal without anesthetics, especially with some Barry White playing in the background, for obvious reasons.

Why does the wheel in the sky keep on turning?

Deanna Pineda: The wheel in the sky keeps on turning because we "Faithfully" "Don't Stop Believin'" in the "Lovin', Touchin', and Squeezin'" with "Open Arms" -- just "Ask the Lonely".

If the moon were made of cheese, what kind of cheese would it be made of? Please explain your reasoning.

Deanna Pineda: The moon would be made of Ray Conniff Instrumental Favorites, the cheesiest of the cheese.

You've just won a contest in which the prize is your "dream car". What make and model of car do you choose? (And no, you can't just take the money.)

Deanna Pineda: My "dream car" would be the flying bed in Bedknobs and Broomsticks, so that when we tour we can save on motel expenses without having to sleep on people's floors.

You can go back in time and kill one person without disrupting the space/time continuum, creating a paradox and causing the universe to collapse upon itself. Who would it be?

Deanna Pineda: It would be whoever conceived of "reality television".

As an experiment, you spend an entire day with a stick of butter duct-taped to your forehead. What do you learn?

Deanna Pineda: After spending an entire day with a stick of butter duct-taped my forehead, I learn that it is better to go vegan, and that duct tape is for ducts.

What do you do now, as a result of widespread internet access, that you didn't do ten years ago?

Deanna Pineda: Ten years ago, I was not able to read about the many things I am lacking, like a larger penis and Human Growth Hormone and a lower mortgage rate, or about the serious problems many Nigerians have in stashing large amounts of money.

The thong: instrument of social change or harbinger of dark times?

Deanna Pineda: Although the thong spends most of its time in a dark crevice, I think it acts more as an instrument of social change, by bringing an end to the dreaded Panty Lines which are Aesthetic Public Enemy #1.

The police have just nailed you for some kind of minor infraction. What were you most likely to have been doing?

Deanna Pineda: Jaywalking while being publicly naked as a jaybird and trying to score a blunt from Jay and Silent Bob.

What article (or articles) of clothing do you wish you never had to wear again? Why?

Deanna Pineda: A thong would be the article of clothing I would never wear again, ath it cautheth me to thtart lithping.

Taking into account all current political, social and economic situations, which country would you most like to be and why?

Deanna Pineda: I would be France, purveyors of the finest cheese (as I am an aficionado of the finest cheese -- see Ray Conniff). France also holds Jerry Lewis in high regard, as I do the Jerry Lewis Telethong.

Tell us about your weirdest experience with a fan.

Deanna Pineda: The weirdest experience was this one fan who I stuck my fingers into and who got turned on, but who then repaid me by slicing off my fingers. That's when I had to defecate on the fan.

Ever written a letter to the editor? What publication, and on what subject?

Deanna Pineda: I wrote a letter to the Washington City Paper correcting coverage of a forum at which all or most of the 1992 Democratic presidential candidates spoke. The writer neglected to note that Bill Clinton received long sustained boos from the audience. I had a heart-on for Jerry Brown.

What's the stupidest thing you've ever done while drunk? If you're a non-drinker, please limit your self-righteous response to 25 words.

Deanna Pineda: Well, I'm stupidly proud of having thrown up on or near the grounds of the $cientology mansion here in DC. L.Ron Hubbard can lick it. From the grave.

What's your favorite thing to do when you can't sleep?

Deanna Pineda: My favorite thing to do when I can't sleep is worry that I can't sleep, which keeps me awake so I can't sleep.

You're making a guest appearance as yourself in the TV show of your choice. What's the show, and how do you fit into the plot?

Deanna Pineda: I would make a guest appearance on PeeWee's Playhouse, in an episode where Cowboy Curtis lassoes and rides, um, me.

A national guardsman from Ohio recently changed his name to Optimus Prime, after the Transformer. If you could change your name to anything, what would you change it to?

Deanna Pineda: I would change my name to Prime Rate Plus 3.5 Points.

We're considering lobbying the government to pass a law banning the use of certain overplayed words -- for example, "new", "flaming" and "electric" -- in band names. What other words should be banned?

Deanna Pineda: WHITE, BLACK, cReED. Also Britney, Justin, and Christina.

Would you rather tour the world for a year, living out of hotels and minibuses, playing to sellout crowds but estranged from all meaningful interpersonal contact, or be crowned the next indie god(s) but be damned to a lifetime of college radio airplay, widespread obscurity and eventual golden years filled with soundtrack work?

Deanna Pineda: How can one be "damned" to "golden years filled with soundtrack work???" That's more like "died and gone to heaven."

What's the most un-rock and roll hobby or interest you have?

Deanna Pineda: Crocheting bedspreads.

What's the stupidest thing a reviewer ever said about you or your band?

Deanna Pineda: "The singer forgot to show up" (we're instrumental).

Which is a better reason for an r rating -- pointless, arbitrary violence or over-the-top kinky sex that has nothing to do with the story?

Deanna Pineda: A Restricted "R" rating is better used against pointless, arbitrary violence, as over-the-top kinky sex is what makes the wheel in the sky keep on turning.

Which would be worse -- going three rounds with Mike Tyson, or having sex with Anna Nicole Smith?

Deanna Pineda: That is hard to say. In either case you risk being viciously bitten (by Tyson or by Smith's dog, "Sugar Pie").

What advice would you give to Michael Jackson?

Deanna Pineda: Go prosthetic. See Nicole Kidman in The Hours or Emmett Kelly.

Here's Cigarbox Planetarium's press thingy, as borrowed from Fanatic Promotion's site:

Cigarbox Planetarium's eponymous release on Oh! Tonito Records (a sister label to Matt Jacobson's esteemed Le Grand Magistery, run by his new bride, Leigh) is a lavish instrumental soundtrack to the movies in your head. Close your eyes and watch as the bossa nova-fueled action flick tumbles down a red velvet rose-bedecked rabbit hole and ends up inside a Technicolored space-age love story, which then mutates into an Esquivel revival in Heaven (the legendary nightclub, silly -- not the place where good people supposedly go when they die!)

Twangy guitar lines provided by Andy Charneco do the Luna Twist around the otherworldly organ tones of Deanna Pineda, all to the preset Samba, Go-Go and Rumba rhythms of their trusty Casio, as Mr. Moonlight smiles benignly from on high. Titles like "Zombie, Please", "Bowler Hat's Nightmare" and "Frankenstein on the Beach" give you an idea of the range of cultural references that whiz by at the speed of The Prisoner's swank green and yellow Lotus Seven Series II. You'll think Mancini and Nino Rota are camping it up to these inspired, retro-lounge sounds -- and who knows? Maybe they are. What's certain is that Cigarbox Planetarium's charming debut will have you reaching for the martini glasses quicker than you can say: "Get Smart!" Just settle back into your barkcloth-covered Barcalounger and snuggle up with Andy and Deanna's dreamy lovesongs without words. They've got a Casio, and they're going to use it, damn it. And they'll make a believer out of you, kiddo. Just don't forget to bring your hula doll.