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What band did you listen to most during the eighties? Do you still like them?
Tim Keegan: The Velvet Underground. Yes.
What is your worst memory of elementary school? Of high school?
Tim Keegan: a) Moving to a new school and being paraded in front of my new schoolmates
holding my mother's hand and wearing denim shorts; b) Being kicked in the balls by a so-called friend.
You're about to -- ahem -- get lucky. What album is playing in the background? Why'd you choose it?
Tim Keegan: Al Green's Call Me. Just right.
What was the first thing you ever shoplifted? Why did you take it?
Tim Keegan: The only thing I can remember ever shoplifting was a copy of the Beatles' White Album from a flea market in Berlin in 1987. I really wanted it, didn't have much money and it was very exciting.
If you could beat up anyone in the world and get away without the usual annoying real-world consequences -- jail time, lawsuits, bad press, etc. --who would it be, and why?
Tim Keegan: George Bush Junior, Colonel Tom Parker, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and one other
person a bit closer to home who shall remain nameless.
What's the biggest risk you've ever taken? Why did you take it?
Tim Keegan: Not getting a "proper" job after university. It seemed like a good idea at
the time.
It's better to regret something you have done than it is to regret something you haven't done. What do you regret doing (other than agreeing to answer these questions)? Why did you do it?
Tim Keegan: I've done lots of things that turned out to be not such a great idea but no
regrets except not doing an apprenticeship with a motor racing team when I
was 16.
Did you go to your high school prom? If so, who did you go with?
Tim Keegan: We don't have high school proms in England, which is something I am still bitter about (no drive-in movie theatres either). I had a chance to go to one last year in Athens, Georgia, but got too drunk the night before. That's another story. I would have gone with Annie Smith.
What movie would you recommend to absolutely anyone? Why?
Tim Keegan: It's A Wonderful Life. Warms the cockles of the coldest heart, even if it is a load of old sentimental tosh.
For reasons we won't bother going into right now, you're going to be locked in the back of a truck for a sixteen hour drive between gigs. If you could have any musician, past or present, back there to keep you company, who would it be?
Tim Keegan: Robyn Hitchcock. This has pretty much happened and I don't think life on the
road gets any more entertaining.
What is your strongest, most unshakeable belief?
Tim Keegan: The good will out.
What's the worst band you've ever heard? Why do they suck?
Tim Keegan: Manic Street Preachers. They just do. Dreadful pompous posturing charisma-free tuneless rubbish. (Except A Design For Life and that one old one, which was quite good).
If you were a porn star, what would your "porn name" be?
Tim Keegan: Isn't that your first pet and your mother's maiden name? In that case it's Susie McEvoy.
You're on your way to a show, and all of a sudden you find yourself in the middle of a huge four-way battle between pirates, ninjas, robots and intelligent apes from the future. Your only hope of getting to your gig is to pick a side. Who do you join, and why?
Tim Keegan: I'm happy to go back home and leave them to it. I'd rather not get involved,
thank you. Just exactly how intelligent are these apes?
If you could sponsor any beverage -- appear in their ads, receive a lifetime supply and never be seen drinking a competing product -- what beverage would it be?
Tim Keegan: Rice dream (vanilla).
What's the best venue you've ever played? What's the worst?
Tim Keegan: Best: A theatre in Prague -- I forget the name, but it has sculptures of ears, sperm and beautiful faces coming out of the walls. Worst: the Princess Charlotte, a horrible indie club in Leicester, England, with sweat coming out of the walls.
What's wrong with Rolling Stone these days?
Tim Keegan: Cameron Crowe doesn't write for it anymore.
Why are frogs amusing?
Tim Keegan: Because they speak English with such a sexy accent.
You've traveled back in time and met yourself, age sixteen. What do you think?
Tim Keegan: Nice bicycle. Bad hair. Simple Minds? No clue.
Which would be worse: three hours on a bus full of four year-olds, or three hours on a bus full of eighty year-olds? Why?
Tim Keegan: I'll take the eighty year olds -- they tend to have better stories.
The US government is considering far more aggressive regulation of leather pants. Under the new rules, who should or shouldn't be allowed to wear them?
Tim Keegan: Iggy Pop only.
What, in your opinion, is the best porn?
Tim Keegan: I'm not a porn fan, but I am partial to the occasional nice bit of erotica.
What food item could you eat every day for the rest of your life without getting bored of it? What's so good about it?
Tim Keegan: Really good chocolate. Solves many of the world's problems.
Will the next Star Wars movie suck? Why or why not?
Tim Keegan: Probably, but isn't that the whole point? Don't care that much, I'm afraid.
How many roads must a man walk down before they call him a man?
Tim Keegan: That's a rhetorical question, isn't it?
Everyone's replacing their least-favorite body parts with cybernetic ones. Which part(s) of your body would you replace?
Tim Keegan: My intestines or my knees.
What topics or statements would inspire you to call in to a talk radio program?
Tim Keegan: Alternative medicine vs. the pharmaceutical industry, reincarnation, the enduring appeal of Elvis Presley.
What album(s) should everyone be given on their eighteenth birthday?
Tim Keegan: If they haven't already got them... Pet Sounds, Rubber Soul, The Velvet
Underground and Blood On The Tracks.
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Departure Lounge have been together since early 1998 when Tim, a recovering singer/songwriter, asked Jake, Chris and Lindsay to play on some new recordings. One evening at the Fortress in London they became a band, having written a thousand songs in the space of a few hours. It's been post-coital bliss ever since. They are now based between Nashville, Brighton and sometimes Paris.
-- George Zahora
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