Those zany, wacky Ex Models Read Splendid's review of Other Mathematics, visit the band's page at Ace Fu Records or buy Ex Models stuff at Insound.

What is your least favorite article of clothing, and why?

Shah Motia: My socks, because they wind up the sweatiest at the end of my day.

What's so funny about peace, love and understanding?

Shah Motia: There's nothing funny about peace, love and understanding. It's just that human beings aren't capable of all three simultaneously.

If you could remove 20ccs of fat from one part of your body and inject it into another, where would the fat come from/go to?

Shah Motia: I would remove the fat from my inner thighs and place it into my left big toe. I've always wanted a freakishly large big toe.

What three essential accessories would be in your dream tour van/vehicle?

Shah Motia: Mike, Jake and Shahin. (His bandmates)

Which is more frightening: a venue full of people who don't like your music, or a room full of two-year-olds? Why?

Shah Motia: A room full of two-year olds, because you can't beat up two-year olds.

Name three activities that would be more interesting/entertaining/enjoyable with the addition of monkeys.

Shah Motia: Voting for President; discussing the merits of Stanley Kubrick's career; pretending to be a veal cutlet.

What is the best venue you've ever played? The Worst?

Shah Motia: The best venue has to be -- unequivocally -- Packee's Pub. Why? They fed us for free; the soundman's competence is to this day still unmatched; and we played one of our best shows ever. What's the worst? Obsessions. Why? Beans, or fish.

What was the last thing you watched on television? How did you like it?

Shah Motia: Breast augmentation surgery on the Discovery Channel. How did I like it? Not as arousing as I thought it would be.

Describe your dream vacation.

Shah Motia: A year-long trip in a machine that allows me to insert myself into any novel I choose, replacing any character of my choice. The vacation would begin with Philip Roth's Portnoy's Complaint, and end with Dom DeLuise's memoirs I Brought the Heffers.

Does everyone need to own a computer? Why or why not?

Shah Motia: No they do not. The answer's obvious, you numbskull.

What activities (or whatever) are currently illegal, but in your opinion shouldn't be? What activities *are* legal, but should be outlawed?

Shah Motia: Impersonating a rabid beaver while operating heavy machinery should definitely not be prohibited. Really, where's the danger in that? It's beyond a "victimless crime". Prostitution should be legalized as well. Living in Alabama should be a class A felony.

Who should be the leader of the free world?

Shah Motia: Hugh Hefner.

You have an eight-hour trip to your next gig. You're not driving, and you're not sleepy. You have the option of reading a book, listening to an album, watching a movie or playing a video game. Which do you choose? And what is the book/album/movie/game in question?

Shah Motia: It depends on what my bandmates are in the mood to tolerate. If it's late at night and others are sleepy, I may read a book. If it's broad daylight and everyone's chipper, I may opt for the album. If I want to disappear in my mind for a while, I'll go with the video game. The book I'd read would be How to Drive Your Bass Player Crazy; the album would be Helloween's Keeper of the Seven Keys: Part II; the video game would be Predator Vs. Mikey.

What was the best live rock show you ever saw?

Shah Motia: There was a Lollapalooza several years ago that featured The Jesus Lizard, Beck, Elastica, Pavement, Hole and Sonic Youth. I mean, what the fuck?!

Scientists have suggested that trainspotting (the hobby of obsessively traveling rail lines, watching trains, cataloguing engine numbers, etc.) is a form of autism. What other so-called "hobbies" might actually be deep-seated psychological disorders?

Shah Motia: Whittling someone's penis with a grated thimble without his permission might be a deep-seated psycholgical disorder. Folding strawberries in gravy is a well known psych disorder. Also, the APA unanimously declared having any sort of affection for the Confederate flag is outright lunacy.

You're in an elevator with Mariah Carey, Marilyn Manson and George W. Bush. The elevator becomes trapped between floors. What happens next?

Shah Motia: George tries to call Daddy with the big red phone; Marilyn and Mariah compare bosoms; I weep.

You've been given the opportunity to play -- all expenses paid -- in a foreign country that bands don't normally get to visit. You get to pick the country. Where do you go?

Shah Motia: Qatar. (Best answer EVER to that question. -- Ed.)

What food item do you always eat, even though you shouldn't? And why shouldn't you be eating it?

Shah Motia: Every once in a while it's McDonald's; makes me feel fat and greasy.

Why are frogs amusing?

Shah Motia: Frogs aren't amusing. They're assholes.

Your favorite broken-up band is going to reunite for one show only at the venue of your choice (yes, we know this is implausible. Who cares?). Who's the band, and what's the venue?

Shah Motia: The band is Gang of Four; the venue is Irving Plaza.

Is the Internet destroying the English language?

Shah Motia: no wayy not ina million years. punctation and zpelling is at they're bests.

Several US states have adopted "three strikes and you're out" laws, which basically mean that after you're found guilty of three felonies, you're imprisoned for life. How do you feel about that? Is it effective lawmaking, or needlessly harsh?

Shah Motia: Such legislation reflects the lowest form of reason and thought. Effectively governing society via the rules of law is a task that demands thorough understanding of human nature, acknowledging various socioeconomic realities/prejudices, and objectivity. To simply model our legal system on the nation's favorite pasttime is an insult to citizens. Instead of baseball, I propose states should model their laws on more complicated games, such as American football, cricket, backgammon, or any variation of poker or gin rummy. These are games in which their rules not only reflect the sentiment "let the punishment fit the crime," but they allow wide lattitide for discretion.

The Ex Models released Other Mathematics, their debut album, on Ace Fu Records this past Spring. The band just returned from a two month national tour, which might explain Shah's antipathy towards frogs.