What is your least favorite article of clothing, and why?
Nikki Colk: My friend Ben's jumper that has "Ben" written on the front. Not that it fits him anymore...
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding?
Nikki Colk: 'Cos it never works, does it? It's all well and good 'til someobdy nicks your stereo and then its blood, death and vengeance.
Which is more frightening: a venue full of people who don't like your
music, or a room full of two-year-olds? Why?
Nikki Colk: A room full of two year olds. People who don't like you tend to avoid you. Two year olds would flock round you like flies round a dog turd, climbing all over you, sticking fingers in your ears. And they'd all be crying and shouting and screaming. People who don't like us would be a breeeeeze!
Name three activities that would be more interesting/entertaining/enjoyable
with the addition of monkeys.
Nikki Colk: I cannot think of one single activity that would not be improved by the addition of monkeys. Except maybe neural surgery. I mean, check it. A Pink Floyd concert wih monkeys! Monkey tennis! Baywatch with monkeys! The list is endless!
What is the best venue you've ever played? What's the worst? Why?
Nikki Colk: The ULU in London, 'cos it's dead near the British Museum, just off Tottenham Court Road. You gotta check it out. We nicked so much stuff in our relentless pursuit of an empire. And you bloody yanks were lucky...
What was the last thing you watched on television? How did you like it?
Nikki Colk: Some bizarre compilation full of the best music clips from British teevee. Including one of l7 showing off their front bottom on live TV. It was okay...
Describe your dream vacation.
Nikki Colk: Anywhere...except that terrible Planet of the Apes... Wait a minute... Statue of Liberty...
Does everyone need to own a computer? Why or why not?
Nikki Colk: No. Why should they? Freedom of choice, man. I'd be lost without one, though, me.
What activities (or whatever) are currently illegal, but in your opinion
shouldn't be? What activities *are* legal, but should be outlawed?
Nikki Colk: Grazing sheep in the city of London. Monkey tennis. There are some bizarre local laws in Britain that were set in the Middle Ages (500 years ago) and forgotten about. Every now and then someone drags out the book and realises it's illegal for Irish Men to be out in Bishops Stortford after 10:00 p.m.
Who should be the leader of the free world?
Nikki Colk: Jon Spencer. Damn!!!
You have an eight-hour trip to your next gig. You're not driving, and you're
not sleepy. You have the option of reading a book, listening to an album,
watching
a movie or playing a video game. Which do you choose? And what is the
book/album/movie/game
in question?
Nikki Colk: I'd watch a movie with subtitles so I could listen to some pop at the same time. Two: A Boute de Souffle and La Fille sur la Ponte. And then Run Lola Run, cos it's only short. Eight hours is a long time, you know...
What was the best live rock show you ever saw?
Nikki Colk: Beastie Boys at Glastonbury in '94. Spin Doctors were on the other stage and you could just hear them when it was quiet. So when the Beasties started playing it was sheer bliss. And they were superb. Oh, and Trail of the Dead at Colchester Arts Centre.
You've been given the opportunity to play -- all expenses paid -- in a
foreign country that
bands don't normally get to visit. You get to pick the country. Where do
you go?
Nikki Colk: Singapore. 'Cos my mum and grandpops used to live there and I wanna go see if it's nicer than here.
What food item do you always eat, even though you shouldn't? And why
shouldn't you be
eating it?
Nikki Colk: Candy cigarettes. I guess 'cos it's not good to eat sweets that encourage kids to smoke. Or just eat sweets in general.
Why are frogs amusing?
Nikki Colk: We have baby frogs in our pond and they are sooooo funny! They are so tiny and they go so fast and their legs are so tiny and their heads are so big! They're so funny!
Your favorite broken-up band is going to reunite for one show only at the
venue of your
choice (yes, we know this is implausible. Who cares?). Who's the band,
and what's the
venue?
Nikki Colk: Pixies Pixies Pixies! Anywhere with a decent, huge sound system.
Is the Internet destroying the English language?
Nikki Colk: No. Bloody Americans are! The internet is giving the English language a new lease on life. People have never written so much in their lives! The real problem is mobile phones and text messages. What's that all about? Vowels are there for a reason! Use them!
Several US states have adopted "three strikes and you're out" laws, which
basically mean
that after you're found guilty of three felonies, you're imprisoned for
life. How do you
feel about that? Is it effective lawmaking, or needlessly harsh?
Nikki Colk: Needlessly harsh. Way way harsh and an infringement on civil liberties. Maybe those US states should look more closely at the causes of crime and spend money on improving the inner cities rather than on more prisons. Crime is just a symptom of a greater social ill! It costs far more to keep someone in priason than it does to create more jobs.
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KaitO's debut, You've Seen Us...You Must Have Seen Us is available on Fierce Panda Records in the UK, and on Devil in the Woods in the US. The band would very much appreciate it if you'd buy at least three copies.
-- George Zahora
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