Travis Higdon: I can't think of a case of worst audience really, just lack of audience. That would be Chapel Hill. We played to three people, and two of them left after a few songs. It was so disappointing that we asked the bar if they'd mind if we just quit, but the one girl that wanted to hear us play, so we played a private show for her.

Katey Jones: Worst audience, let's see...maybe in Chapel Hill, NC. It wasn't that it was so much as a bad audience, but no audience. Both times. Evidently people don't go to see bands unless they know somebody in the band. Pretty lame. I hope I never have to go back to that town. The second time we played there we decided that we should make cardboard cutouts of people to put out in front of the stage for those bad nights. If nothing else, we'd be entertained by it.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY MEAL FROM ANYWHERE, WHAT WOULD YOU EAT?

TH: That's a lot of pressure for one meal. I don't really care that much, as long as it tastes good and makes me full.
KJ: Either cajun or bar-b-q. Yum Yum.

WHICH COULD YOU LIVE WITHOUT MORE READILY: TELEVISION OR HAIR CARE PRODUCTS?

TH: I already live without hair care products, but Katey requires a whole suitcase for hers.
KJ: Television.

WHAT WAS YOUR MAJOR IN COLLEGE?

TH: I majored in Advertising (blech!) and never used it. I'm taking night school now for C++ programming. Gavin majored in Chemistry, Phillip majored in English, then went to (and graduated from) law school.
KJ: Mass media production.

ARE YOU A DOG PERSON OR A CAT PERSON?

TH: Cat person. I like them because they keep to themselves. Dwayne has an idiotic dog that annoys us every time we go to his house for practice.
KJ: Cat.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT BRUSSELS SPROUTS?

TH: Love 'em, but rarely actually eat them.
KJ: I could take them or leave them.

NAME THREE PEOPLE YOU REALLY ADMIRE.

TH: Nicolas Cage because he has a lot of cars, Pamela Anderson cause she's so hot, and Jay Leno because he's so famous.
KJ: My sister and my two brothers.

IF YOU COULD LIVE AT ANY POINT IN THE PAST, WHEN AND WHERE WOULD YOU LIVE?

TH: I guess I'd like to live in Columbus, TX, way back in 1997. I hear it was wild, man, wild! (Columbus is a small town between Austin & Houston)
KJ: New York City in the 1920s.

WHAT MEDIUM REPRESENTS THE GREATEST PROPORTION OF YOUR CULTURAL "LANDMARKS" -- TV, FILM, MUSIC, ART, ETC.?

TH: Music & Movies.
KJ: Oh everything I guess. I don't feel like answering this one.

WHAT WAS THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT?

TH: I just bought 2000 copies of Junior Varsity's new CD, "Bam Bam Bam!" on Peek-a-Boo Records.
KJ: The Make Up, and Brian Jonestown Massacre. I bought them on the same day at the same time.

DEFINE THE PHRASE "JANGLY GUITAR POP".

TH: Post-Beatles?
KJ: Christmas songs.

NAME A MUSICIAN OR GENRE WHOSE POPULARITY YOU JUST DON'T GET.

TH: I think I used to have an answer to that, but I don't pay attention enough anymore to know.
KJ: Ricky Martin.

WHAT FRIGHTENS YOU?

TH: Yuppies and Sports, specifically their power and influence over our culture.
KJ: Basements.

WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING IF YOU WEREN'T DOING MUSIC?

TH: Petty crime.
KJ: Everything else that I do everyday.

· · · · · · ·

Though recently rumored to have called it quits, Splendid favorites the Kiss Offs are still going strong. Last August, the Kiss Offs were kind enough to sit down with me for what has become known as the "Goddamn Lost *#@&%^ Kiss Offs Interview," due to the entire 30-minute interview being rendered totally incoherent by the loud radio playing in the restaurant at which it was conducted. The picture above is the only surviving artefact from the interview.