|
Various religions suggest that there's a "special" hell for certain sins (hurting children, being cruel to animals, using the word "blog" as a verb, etc). Who else needs a "special" hell?
Ryan Shanahan: People who drive too slow in the left lane.
Due to poor financial planning, you've got to eat for an entire week on only US$10. What do you buy, food-wise?
Ryan Shanahan: PB&J, store brand wheat bread.
What's the biggest misconception that people have about you?
Ryan Shanahan: Not sure, maybe that there's some element of tough guy in me?
What's the worst injury you've ever suffered for your art (i.e. second degree burns from shorted-out mic, broken leg from failed stage dive)? Tell us about it.
Ryan Shanahan: Nothing that bad. I've chipped teeth on mics, and I threw out my back loading once.
You've got unlimited funding and technical expertise to make an IMAX movie on the topic of your choice. What do you choose? Describe the obligatory vertigo-inducing camera shot that makes the entire audience clutch their stomachs.
Ryan Shanahan: The underwater ones are usually the best...
You've locked your car keys inside the tour van and don't have AAA. How do you get the door open?
Ryan Shanahan: A coathanger? That would be a tough for us because we have power locks... We all have a set of keys, so it's almost impossible.
Ever find useful stuff in the garbage? Describe your best-ever dumpster find and how you used it.
Ryan Shanahan: On our first tour we didn't have a drum hardware bag. We found a shitty old, long and narrow bag in the trash that lasted quite a while. That was a great find.
In the UK, trying to kill the Queen is still technically a capital offence. If the Queen tried to commit suicide and failed, could she be sentenced to death? Explain.
Ryan Shanahan: She should. I don't see what the point of a Queen is anyway. They don't hold any political power, correct? What are they? A figurehead? Wasted money?
Everyone likes at least one cheesy/crappy song that totally kills their cred. What's yours?
Ryan Shanahan: I sort of liked that Cure-ish Blink 182 song. That's a cred killer for sure.
The standard touring vehicle is always a beat-up van. What has been the worst/weirdest method of conveyance you've had to use on a tour?
Ryan Shanahan: Our first van, had barely any windows, no radio, started about half of the time, and had a really bad oil leak. While driving it would leak oil onto the hot exhaust pipe. It would burn and the smoke would come billowing into the van. It was hard to breathe and the van was always in danger of catching on fire. We didn't have a fire extinguisher, either...
What was the best meal you were supplied by a tour venue? What was the worst?
Ryan Shanahan: The Triple Rock in Minneapolis gives you basically whatever you want off of the menu. Delicious -- huge portions too. The dudes from Dillinger Four run it so they know what's up.
Will it ever truly be possible to "rock the vote", or will apathy, indifference and laziness always triumph over activism?
Ryan Shanahan: I'd like to think it's possible. It's going to take a lot more than just rocking the vote, though. We need to get every young voter at the polls regardless of whether they "rock" or not.
What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen (and don't choose one of your own)?
Ryan Shanahan: My friend has the thunderbird logo (from the Gibson Thunderbird bass) big across his upper back. I always that was pretty gnarly...
How long after an unopened gallon of milk's "use-by" date has passed would you be willing to use it?
Ryan Shanahan: The date is unimportant, it's all about how it smells...
What is the most unusual item you've thrown up on/in?
Ryan Shanahan: I woke up in my own vomit in New Orleans. Not necessarily unusual, but interesting when you don't remember doing it. I could have died...
You've been asked to submit an anecdote or "tip" to a book called Everything I Need to Know About Life I Learned On Tour With My Band. What do you tell them?
Ryan Shanahan: Never underestimate the power of headphones.
What basic freedoms are you prepared to give up in exchange for your and your family's safety?
Ryan Shanahan: Nothing. I'm willing to take the risk.
There are literally hundreds of euphemisms for masturbation. What's the best one you've heard?
Ryan Shanahan: Not necessarily the best, but I like to call it "rubbing one out".
Which is worse: downloading an album and burning copies for five friends, or shoplifting one physical copy of the same CD from an overpriced national retailer? Explain your answer.
Ryan Shanahan: Not sure. I don't have a problem with people stealing CDs from overpriced national retailers or downloading them. For me it's important to buy CDs from indie labels, it has less to do with who is selling it. It has more to do with who put it out.
A few years ago, anal sex was still taboo; nowadays it's trendy. What will be the next major sexual taboo to fall?
Ryan Shanahan: I never got the memo that it officially "fell" into the trendy category. I'll have to remember that.
What, in your opinion, is the best book ever written? And why?
Ryan Shanahan: The Story B. Read it and find out.
The USA needs a universal health care system. So far, no President has gotten anywhere near implementing one. Why do you think they keep failing? (Bonus: Outline your own plan for universal health care in 100 words or less.)
Ryan Shanahan: Because it costs money and it would negatively affect many of the parties that just so happen to contribute to political campaigns.
Right this very second, what are you most looking forward to, and why?
Ryan Shanahan: Our March tour. Because it beats the hell out of working at home.
· · · · · · ·
Lock and Key released Pull Up the Floorboards six months ago. By the time you read this, they'll have finished touring.
-- George Zahora
| 
