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What band did you listen to most during the eighties? Do you still like them?
Jean Smith: PiL. Yes.
What is your worst memory of elementary school? Of high school?
Jean Smith: Fifth grade -- I twirled around on one foot after receiving glorious praise from my beloved Miss Whitely and managed to kick her really hard in the shin. High school would have to do with one of the times when I was called to the office to be dragged home by my parents after they'd searched my room.
You're about to -- ahem -- get lucky. What album is playing in the
background? Why'd you choose it?
Jean Smith: Rova Saxophone Quartet. Because it is easy to turn off.
What was the first thing you ever shoplifted? Why did you take it?
Jean Smith: Gooey, shimmery baby blue eye shadow, eighth grade, from Woolworth's. Because it was packaged in a sphere that unscrewed around the middle.
If you could beat up anyone in the world and get away without the usual annoying real-world consequences -- jail time, lawsuits, bad press, etc. -- who would it be, and why?
Jean Smith: Violence begets violence. I don't not beat people up because of real world consequences. I don't want to beat anyone up.
What's the biggest risk you've ever taken? Why did you take it?
Jean Smith: Going to India alone for two months without a plan of where to go or what to do. To see what would happen.
It's better to regret something you have done than it is to regret something you haven't done. What do you regret doing (other than agreeing to answer these questions)? Why did you do it?
Jean Smith: I regret continuing to drink well past a time when it would have been advantageous to quit, and I regret allowing my parents treat me disrespectfully well into my adult years. I think these two issue are connected.
Did you go to your high school prom? If so, who did you go with?
Jean Smith: I went with my friend Craig Oliver, nick-named Ollie. We were the class of '77. He wore a brown polyester suit, I'd made my flowered seersucker dress. He pinned the corsage on me, and off we drove in his red Capri with the 8-track blaring "China Grove".
What movie would you recommend to absolutely anyone? Why?
Jean Smith: Harold and Maude, because it made Cat Stevens sound good.
For reasons we won't bother going into right now, you're going to be locked in the back of a truck for a sixteen hour drive between gigs. If you could have any musician, past or present, back there to keep you company, who would it be?
Jean Smith: Leonard Cohen.
What is your strongest, most unshakeable belief?
Jean Smith: Injustice is not fair.
If you could sponsor any beverage -- appear in their ads, receive a lifetime supply and never be seen drinking a competing product --what beverage would it be?
Jean Smith: If I could get sponsorship from a provider of a pure water without a logo or a capitalist agenda, like a water intended to promote the awareness that we are ruining the planet and that we still might have time to change course before we totally screw ourselves... that would be a good arrangement. The deal would include a literature table at our stadium performances with a selection of ideas on the environment. My water would become a recognizable focal point for an intensive "how to save the planet campaign"... or Coke.
What's the best venue you've ever played? What's the worst? Why?
Jean Smith: The IMC in Champaign-Urbana was very good. Tables and chairs, a wide range of ages, well-lit area to hang art, they helped us sell merch, gave us water and handed over an apartment to us before they'd even met us, excellent sound, amazing hosts who do great work. One of the worst was a soup kitchen in San Francisco in about 1986. We felt like it was so... we felt like we were doing something positive, until it became obvious that people would have rather eaten in peace without us creating an aggressive disturbance; perhaps it was the first time I recognized that good intentions and reality are often separate. Or that smoky club with no band room, no place to sit down, no heat/AC, no stage, crap PA, nasty sound guy, bad neighborhood, no parking, broken mic stand, hole in the stage covered with a carpet, where you get paid less than agreed upon by the creepy guy at the bar who won't give you a glass of water. That place.
What's wrong with Rolling Stone these days?
Jean Smith: You mean that sensational, sexist, cloying, proponent of capitalism that expropriates youth culture and sells it back to us while intending to make its readers believe that actual life can't be as exciting as the warped vision they pass off as reality? The soul-free fashion magazine determined to indoctrinate consumers before they have a chance to explore options outside mainstream shopping sprees in logo-encrusted malls that delight in replacing community-level interactions? Gap equals clothing. Nike equals shoes. Music equals... whoever they choose. Essentially, it is best to be suspicious of corporate funded editorial content flanked by overtly contrived messages.
Why are frogs amusing?
Jean Smith: Because humans are doing the laughing, and we're inclined to bouts of anthropomorphism.
Which would be worse: three hours on a bus full of four year-olds,
or three hours on a bus full of eighty year-olds? Why?
Jean Smith: Three hours of four year olds would be worse than three hours of eighty year olds; by a slight margin, I prefer whining and complaining to screaming and crying.
The us government is considering far more aggressive regulation of leather pants. Under the new rules, who should or shouldn't be allowed to wear them?
Jean Smith: People with glasses.
What food item could you eat every day for the rest of your life without getting bored of it? What's so good about it?
Jean Smith: Grapes. The packaging concept is excellent. Eat as few as you like and the remainder stay fresh in their skins. Pure genius!
How many roads must a man walk down before they call him a man?
Jean Smith: Any part of any old road will do. You make it sound like being a man is a good thing.
What album(s) should everyone be given on their eighteenth birthday?
Jean Smith: Peter Jefferies' Last Great Challenge in a Dull World and Mecca Normal's The Family Swan would offer palpable perspective.
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Mecca Normal are presently touring behind their first Kill Rock Stars release, The Family Swan. Jean Smith and Dave Lester are, as they put it themselves, "not just an underground rock duo"; their work, whether we're talking recordings, writing, art or whatever they're doing this week, can always be counted upon to make you think a little harder.
-- George Zahora
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