Phil Spirito:: Is there still pork?

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANYTHING IN THE WORLD COMPLETELY TO YOURSELF FOR ONE DAY -- AND OBJECT OR PLACE -- WHAT WOULD IT BE?

Phil Spirito:: I'd love to be the Pope for one day. I'd traipse around Rome doing all kinds of things the Popa could get away with but never bothers to do.

IF A MOVIE WAS MADE ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WHERE WOULD IT BE SHELVED IN THE VIDEO STORE?

Phil Spirito:: Comedy/western.

YOU'RE GUEST-HOSTING A NIGHT-TIME TALK SHOW FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY. WHO WOULD BE YOUR IDEAL GUESTS?

Phil Spirito:: Don Van Vliet.

IF YOU JOINED THE CIRCUS, WHAT WOULD YOU DO THERE?

Phil Spirito:: Sound effects guy in the pit band.

WHAT PERSON -- FAMOUS OR NOT -- CAN YOU IMITATE BEST?

Phil Spirito:: Francis Ford Cappolla.

IF YOU HAD TO EITHER WALK OR RUN TEN MILES EVERY DAY, WHERE WOULD YOU WANT TO DO IT?

Phil Spirito:: Buxton, Maine.

WHAT'S THE BEST SONG EVER WRITTEN?

Phil Spirito:: This week it's still "old laughing lady" by Neil Young -- holding in there for its fifth week!

YOU'VE BEEN GIVEN A POTION THAT ALLOWS YOU TO BECOME INVISIBLE FOR EXACTLY ONE HOUR. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO FOR THAT HOUR?

Phil Spirito:: Hang out in Laura Bush's bathroom in the early morning...

YOU'VE JUST WRITTEN YOUR AUTOBIOGRAPHY. WHAT'S IT CALLED?

Phil Spirito:: All I ever wanted was to be a bum!

WHAT'S THE LONGEST YOU'VE EVER STOOD IN LINE? WHY'D YOU DO IT?

Phil Spirito:: Tickets for Tom Waits in '85 and '99.

IF YOU COULD HAVE 100 POUNDS OF ANYTHING (OTHER THAN MONEY), WHAT WOULD YOU WANT?

Phil Spirito:: (censored).

WHAT THOUGHT OR SENTIMENT WOULD YOU LIKE TO PUT INTO ONE MILLION FORTUNE COOKIES?

Phil Spirito:: Whoa Dude!

MICROSOFT OFFERS YOU $5 MILLION (US) TO USE ONE OF YOUR SONGS IN ALL WINDOWS MILLENNIUM ADVERTISING. DO YOU TAKE THE MONEY? WHAT DO YOU DO WITH IT?

Phil Spirito:: Absolutely! I'd live off it so I can quit my job!

WHAT ARTICLE OF CLOTHING SHOULD NEVER BE MADE OUT OF LEATHER, AND WHY?

Phil Spirito:: Lederhosen, obviously!

IF YOU COULD DO ONLY ONE JOB, 8 HOURS A DAY, 5 DAYS A WEEK FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, WHAT WOULD YOU WANT THAT JOB TO BE?

Phil Spirito:: NY subway train engineer.

WHAT IS THE MOST THOUGHTFUL THING A VENUE HAS EVER DONE FOR YOU?

Phil Spirito:: (Provided) fresh socks and a home cooked meal.

WHAT IS THE WORST WAY TO DIE?

Phil Spirito:: By fire.

IF YOU COULD BE THE SPOKESPERSON FOR ANY PRODUCT ON THE MARKET, WHAT PRODUCT WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO REPRESENT?

Phil Spirito:: Don Perillio's Italian travel agency. His package deals rock!

IF YOU HAD TO JOIN THE CAST OF ONE OF THE CURRENT CROP OF REALITY TV SHOWS, WHICH ONE WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

Phil Spirito:: Survivor -- More Lord of the Flies and less Reality Bites.

Perhaps you remember Phil Spirito from Rex. But quit living in the past -- he's just released Long Time By, his sophomore effort as Orso. Eager for tales of "horse racing, low level mobsters, lady pyromaniacs, bull riding truck drivers and tiny ghost horses"? Check it out. You might want to read our review of it, too.