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Dear Readers: Rich and Mark didn't distinguish who answered what, so we've attributed the answers to both of them. Perhaps they alternated words.
You can choose to have one -- and only one -- super power. Other than gaining that power, you remain exactly the same as you are now. What super power would you pick, and why?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: X-ray vision, man! For obvious reasons. You can stare at hot naked
ladies...and men.
You've been given the money and resources to produce a movie biography of the most significant, influential person in your life. Who's it about, what's the story, and who plays the central character?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: My weird concrete worker, shooting rabbits in his city backyard
grandfather. It'd probably be a story about coming to the US,
meeting my grandmother, and then going to fight in a war on behalf
of the US on the soil of his home country.
Summarize your driving ability in 25 words or less.
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I walk up to the metrocard machine and i buy a weekly unlimited
pass. I hang on and maintain great balance as the subway car driver
takes me from point A to B.
What is the function of your music in a capitalist society?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: To take off your clothes and have sex in the streets. Drop your
briefcase and start shaking your ass.
You've just entered a contest in which the prize is an MP3 player loaded with the complete, exhaustive recorded output of any artist you choose. You win. Who do you choose?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I can't see how anyone would answer anything other than Led
Zeppelin to this question.
What are you carrying on your person -- in your pockets, purse, et cetera -- right now?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Keys, lip balm, cell phone, wallet with dusty condoms, and a bag of
hash brahhh!
You're on tour, you're in an unfamiliar city, you haven't eaten in 24 hours, and due to some poor financial decisions, you have only a single unit of the local currency -- one dollar, one pound, or thereabouts. What do you eat?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: The grocery store. You can buy five Ramen, a can of soup, or a loaf of bread for a dollar or less. You can buy a can of soda for twenty five cents.
What was the last song you danced to? Who, if anyone, did you dance with?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: "What A Wonderful World". I danced with my very Asian girlfriend in
our luxurious one bedroom apartment.
When did you last make a mountain out of a molehill?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Every practice when someone makes a mistake. I'm the mistake Nazi in
the band.
Post-Schwarzenegger, are there any high-profile people you'd like to see run for governor or other high office? Who and why?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I would choose Mr T. He needs work and he's just as big as Arnold
and Jesse.
Apart from cheeseburgers, what is the cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: My brother has this habit of eating one orange every day. So I
started eating one for breakfast every day, and it really seems to
help, especially when all I used to consume was coffee.
Everyone can do at least a couple of decent imitations -- of celebrities, maybe, or associates, friends and family. Who can you "do"?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I can bust out a mean motherfucking John Travolta!
Let's assume that god is a DJ. What's on his playlist right now?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I'm not sure, but I have a feeling that God listens to nothing but crappy
emo music. I've been trying to get God to start digging metal. He's
always saying that's the devil's music. What a pansy.
Who was your favourite teacher in high school? Why?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I had this math teacher, Mr. Koenig. It was really strange, he let
me sleep in class and cheat on tests. When you went up to turn your
papers in, he had the answers there so you could check your work,
so I'd just change them right there at his desk. I'm certain he saw
me, but he never said anything. So I got all As in that class.
Except for the final exam, I actually studied for it and I'm
certain that I got at least 80 percent of it right. But when the grades
came out I saw he had given me a zero (even though I had not
cheated on that particular test at all). It was almost like he was
trying to tell me that he was well aware of all the previous tests
I had cheated on and I was not even worth worrying about. I thought
that was a pretty cool way to handle it. Years later I saw him at
the DMV and he was pretty personable. I'm not even sure if he
remembered the situation at all.
What is your favorite "comfort food" when you're on tour?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Anything free.
What essential item are you most likely to leave at home when you're heading out on tour? What do you do about it?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: This kind of shit never happens to me. I'd write a list if it was
important, I'm an engineer.
Aliens have just landed, and you get to select the earth's goodwill ambassador. Who do you pick, and why?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I like Steve Buscemi for that one, he's mostly a nice guy. Also, he
kind of looks like an alien. I think that'd be an advantage.
You wake up one morning and discover that you have dolphin telepathy. What do you do with it?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Meaning I can talk with dolphins without
speaking? Wow... Um, probably nothing different than
I would on a normal day. I mean, c'mon, we're not talking invisibility here, we're talking dolphin
telepathy.
You've just been hit in the face with a large chocolate cream pie. How do you react?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I haven't had pie in forever. I would salvage as much as I could and
eat it. I love pie.
Assuming that you must choose one, which would you rather listen to for an hour: Christian rock, mainstream country or Jessica Simpson?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Jessica Simpson, at least she admits she's a dumbass.
What's the deal with those damn raccoons?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: They like garbage. Pick up your shit, you fucking slob.
What is the most awkward moment in which you have caught a person adjusting, scratching, or otherwise handling his or her own genitals?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I was walking home from seeing 28 Days Later. On the way my
girlfriend and I crossed the path of someone jacking off on his
stoop in Brooklyn. He freaked when he saw us and put his dirty dick
back in his sweatpants.
You're sitting in a pub when an errant dart from the games area strikes you in the leg. With the dart pointing out of your body, do you pull it out, shout for help or attack the jackass who hit you?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: If it was intentional affront, I'd leave it stuck in me until I
finished my drink. If you react badly to these sorts of things it
only eggs people on.
What is sexy?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Anything that gives me a raging boner, I guess.
It's hard to say...Get it? HARD to say.
What is the strangest thing you've ever had for breakfast?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Astronaut ice cream. I had nothing to eat and I was at Liberty
Science Center so I had to buy astronaut ice cream. It was tasty as
hell, too!
Which non-music related product (i.e. -- no instruments, microphones, etc.) would you most like to be a celebrity spokesperson for?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: I would be the spokesperson for Lubriderm Lotion. They seriously
make an amazing product. It does wonders for skin.
If you had an army of super-intelligent lab mice to do your bidding, what evil deeds would you have them do?
Rich Thrush and Mark Moody: Oh, you know, the usual super-intelligent lab mice-type stuff.
· · · · · · ·
Slicing and sinister, New Jersey's The Quick Fix Kills arrived at My Pal God just in time for the release of their debut full-length, Saint Something. Guitars spike and mutate around one another as singer Mark Moody unleashes a verbal assault that rises above. Catch them on tour in Texas and Florida next month (October, 2004).
-- George Zahora
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