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Various religions suggest that there's a "special" hell for certain sins (hurting children, being cruel to animals, using the word "blog" as a verb, etc). Who else needs a "special" hell?
Spike Priggen: Anyone who ever uses the word "diva" in any context.
Due to poor financial planning, you've got to eat for an entire week on only US$10. What do you buy, food-wise?
Spike Priggen: A lotta rice and beans I guess.
What's the biggest misconception that people have about you?
Spike Priggen: That I'm not a big pothead.
What's the worst injury you've ever suffered for your art (i.e. second degree burns from shorted-out mic, broken leg from failed stage dive)? Tell us about it.
Spike Priggen: Having PF Sloan ask me if I had "brain problems as a child" after I performed in a "tribute" to him, because he thought I had gotten some lyrics wrong (I hadn't). This was more of a psychic injury that this caused -- does that count?
You've got unlimited funding and technical expertise to make an IMAX movie on the topic of your choice. What do you choose? Describe the obligatory
vertigo-inducing camera shot that makes the entire audience clutch their
stomachs.
Spike Priggen: The Joe Meek Story. (Vertigo-inducing shot:) The one where he shoots himself and his landlady with a shotgun.
You've locked your car keys inside the tour van and don't have AAA. How do you get the door open?
Spike Priggen: Find a cop to get it open with one of those special things they have...
In the UK, trying to kill the Queen is still technically a capital offence. If the Queen tried to commit suicide and failed, could she be sentenced to death? Explain.
Spike Priggen: I hope so. I don't like the queen.
If you were a 50ft high Tyrannosaurus Rex, would you use your powers for good or evil? Who would you go after first?
Spike Priggen: Good. Phil Hellmuth.
You've decided to write a musical. What's it about and who's the star?
Spike Priggen: It's about poker and it stars Gabe Kaplan.
What's your favorite board game? Why do you like it?
Spike Priggen: Scrabble. Words.
Everyone likes at least one cheesy/crappy song that totally kills their cred. What's yours?
Spike Priggen: I wish there was only one. How about the entire recorded output of Paul Williams?
The standard touring vehicle is always a beat-up van. What has been the worst/weirdest method of conveyance you've had to use on a tour?
Spike Priggen: A Eurail pass. We had to carry all our gear on our backs.
Will it ever truly be possible to "rock the vote", or will apathy, indifference and laziness always triumph over activism?
Spike Priggen: The vote is not rockable.
You discover a new disease, "(Your name here)'s Syndrome". What are its symptoms? What is the cure for "(Your name here)'s Syndrome"?
Spike Priggen: Spike's Syndrome involves watching about 16 hours of TV a day. Don't think there's a cure for it.
You want to cry? I'll give you something to cry about. What would you like to cry about?
Spike Priggen: I cry about movies and TV shows.
What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen (and don't choose one of your own)?
Spike Priggen: Eddie G has that coffee cup with the nuclear atom symbol on it...
How long after an unopened gallon of milk's "use-by" date has passed would you be willing to use it?
Spike Priggen: As long as it smelled right.
Do you prefer the term "underwear" or "underpants"? What does that say about you?
Spike Priggen: Neither -- It says I don't wear any!
You've been asked to submit an anecdote or "tip" to a book called Everything I Need to Know About Life I Learned On Tour With My Band. What do you tell them?
Spike Priggen: Don't wait till you're past 30 to start smoking cigarettes.
Due to a breakthrough in technology, it's possible to learn any skill, no matter how complex, pretty much instantly, by uploading the information directly into your brain (yes, like in The Matrix). Unfortunately, you can only do it once. What skill would you learn, and why?
Spike Priggen: I'd like to be good at math. 'Cause I'm BAD at math.
Not to be morbid, but let's assume that (a) you've died, and (b) you filled
out an organ donor card and potential recipients are lining up. Which part
of your body do you think will be most sought-after? Are there any bits
no-one will want?
Spike Priggen: My tonsils. (No-one will want) my lungs.
A long-lost possession has turned up on Ebay, and you're prepared to pay much more than it's worth just to finally get it back. What is it? Why is it worth so much to you?
Spike Priggen: My Batman car and boat that I had as a kid. It shoots real bullets out of the back!
You've been given the resources and financial backing to create a new satellite TV network that caters specifically to your tastes and the tastes of people like you. What's it called, and what does it show?
Spike Priggen: It would be called Spike TV but they stole that name already. Actually, it already exists on the web and it's called Bedazzled. It shows retro music video and other pop culture oddities.
There are literally hundreds of euphemisms for masturbation. What's the best one you've heard?
Spike Priggen: Spiking The Spike.
A few years ago, anal sex was still taboo; nowadays it's trendy. What will be the next major sexual taboo to fall?
Spike Priggen: Ear fucking.
What, in your opinion, is the best book ever written? And why?
Spike Priggen: Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson. It just is.
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Spike Priggen has been in bands you've kind of heard of for the last 20-odd years -- Liquor Giants, the Hello Strangers, Dumptruck, you name it. His most recent solo effort, Stars After Stars After Stars, is a collection of songs by bands he's been in (is it really a cover if you were in the band?) and bands that influenced him. We liked it a lot.
-- George Zahora
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