WHAT IS THE MOST EMBARRASSING THING YOU'VE EVER DONE IN A FAST FOOD
RESTAURANT?
Frank Meyer: Puked all over the tables.
IF YOU COULD ELECT A MUSICIAN AS PRESIDENT OF THE U.S. (OR LEADER OF YOUR
HOME COUNTRY), WHO WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
FN: I would have chosen Frank Zappa or Bill Hicks, before they died. Now I'd
choose George Carlin.
HAVE YOU EVER SHOPLIFTED? WHAT DID YOU TAKE AND WHY?
FN: I shoplifted two tapes from a Music Plus back in Junior High. The tapes were
Jeff Beck's Blow By Blow and Faster Pussycat's 1st album. I got caught and they
asked me to fork over what I'd stolen. I just gave them the Pussycat tapes
and kept the Beck on me during the whole ordeal. They threatened to call the
cops but didn't. They let me go and I went home and listened to Blow By Blow all night.
NAME A BOOK THAT MADE YOU CRY, AND TELL US WHY.
FN: No book has ever made me cry.
WHICH IS MORE EXCITING WITH A MEMBER OF WHICHEVER SEX YOU "GO FOR": A CLOSE GAME OF
TWISTER OR AN INTENSE GAME OF SCRABBLE?
FN: Naked Twister would be the way to go.
WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE FORM OF EXERCISE?
FN: Playing on stage.
WHAT DID YOU DO FOR THE MILLENNIUM?
FN: Passed out drunk and puked from bad clams.
NAME THREE SITUATIONS THAT WOULD BE MUCH FUNNIER WITH THE ADDITION OF
MONKEYS.
FN: EVERYTHING is funnier with the addition of Monkeys. But, since you ask: sex, tripping on acid, and playing on stage.
IF YOU COULD ISSUE ONE ALBUM OR ONE BOOK TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD ON THEIR
THIRTEENTH BIRTHDAY, WHAT WOULD THE ALBUM/BOOK BE?
FN: One of these: Letters To A Young Poet by Rainer Rilke, Fear & Loathing In Las Vegas by Hunter Thompson and Crazy From The
Heat by David Lee Roth.
WHERE WOULD YOU RATHER PLAY: A CLUB THAT GIVES YOU LOTS OF GREAT FREE FOOD BUT HAS HORRIBLE
BATHROOMS, OR A CLUB THAT DOESN'T FEED YOU BUT HAS HOT SHOWERS AND BIG FLUFFY TOWELS?
FN: Always take the food. Always. Fluffy towels are for fags.
ARE YOU COMFORTABLE SHOPPING ONLINE? IF SO, WHAT DO YOU BUY?
FN: I buy lots of music online and on eBay. I have no problem with it at all and
have yet to be ripped off. Just bought a Plasmatics book online...
WHAT WAS THE WORST INVENTION OF THE 20TH CENTURY?
FN: The beeper.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH KIDS TODAY ANYWAY?
FN: They don't listen to rock n' roll anymore -- just techno metal and dance music.
IS A FEMALE PRESIDENT THE ANSWER TO AMERICA'S PROBLEMS?
FN: A good president is the answer -- male or female.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT CELLULAR PHONES? LIKE THEM? HATE THEM? GRUDGINGLY
APPRECIATE THEM? WHAT? WHAT, DAMMIT?!
FN: Used to hate 'em before I had one for work for a bit and now they don't
bother me that much. I like it in the car, but hate when you're talking to
someone in person and they take a cell call right in front of you. It's like,
"Dude, I'M RIGHT HERE NOW!!!"
TELL US ABOUT YOUR PETS. IF YOU HAVE NO PETS, MAKE ONE UP.
FN: I have a cat nameed Iggy who acts like maniac, screams all the time. Recently
I had to have his dick cut off due to bladder problem -- he doesn't scream
quite as much anymore.
NAME AN OBJECT YOU OWN THAT HAS LITTLE MONETARY VALUE, BUT THAT YOU WOULDN'T SELL FOR A MILLION DOLLARS.
FN: My Six Million Dollar Man action figure set...and my Mr T doll.
WHAT'S HARDER: PLAYING SOLO FOR AN AUDIENCE OF 1000 FOR AN HOUR, OR GIVING A 30-MINUTE SPEECH TO THE SAME AUDIENCE?
FN: 30 minute speech -- who wants to hear or play an hour long solo????
IF YOU HAD TO BE TRAPPED IN A TV SHOW FOR A MONTH, WHAT SHOW WOULD YOU CHOOSE? AND WHY?
FN: Baywatch - for the chicks!
WHAT IS THE FUNNIEST LOOKING ANIMAL?
FN: Mark "The Animal" Mendoza from Twisted Sister.
IF YOU COULD HAVE THE "ORIGINAL" OF ANYTHING, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
FN: The original super 8 footage of the Stooges video boolegs I have. Mine are
all grainy looking...
NAME A COMMERCIAL JINGLE THAT, FOR YOU, WAS CATCHIER THAN MOST POP SONGS.
FN: That song "You Better Be Strong, you better..." -- until I found out it was
a real song.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
FN: Payday.
WHAT IS THE MOST FASCINATING SMELL?
FN: Farts.
IF YOU KNEW THAT BY NEVER LISTENING TO LOUD MUSIC AGAIN YOU'D ADD TEN YEARS TO YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU DO IT?
FN: Fuck no.
WHAT KIND OF PERSON WEARS THONG UNDERWEAR?
FN: The lead singer of the Streetwalkin' Cheetahs -- me. Becasue I don't like my
privates dangling around. I like them snug like a bug in a rug.
IF YOU HAD TO GIVE UP ONE SENSE (SIGHT/SMELL/TOUCH/TASTE/HEARING), WHICH ONE COULD YOU MOST READILY DO WITHOUT?
FN: Smell -- I live in LA so I could do without it.
