What's the worst "day job" you've ever had?
Tom Ackerman: I worked at a McDonald's for about 6 months when I was 16. I wanted a
double bass drum pedal. I earned enough for the pedal and then got fired for shooting a co-worker with the tartar sauce gun...
How much time do you spend on the internet each week? What
do you do when you're on?
Tom Ackerman: Approximately seven hours a week, mostly email stuff as well as Mapquest and Moviefone.
Most people, whether they're willing to admit it or not,
have a uniform -- clothing they'll
default to when left to their own devices. What's your uniform?
Tom Ackerman: Levi's 501s or Dickies (a size too large) and t-shirt. Converse low tops.
PC or Mac (or Linux/etc.)? Why?
Tom Ackerman: PC. Compatibility is a hassle. Aren't these things supposed to make our lives easier?
What is your definition of a "good person"?
Tom Ackerman: Someone in denial. Or brainwashed by the "lord".
What is the dumbest fashion trend of the last hundred years?
Tom Ackerman: Platform sneakers. Huge skater/raver pants.
What book (or books) that you read as a child has most influenced your life as an adult?
Tom Ackerman: The autobiography of Joe Namath. Turned me into both the fan of the Jets and the anti-hero.
What was the most important trend/cultural paradigm shift of the year 2000?
Tom Ackerman: Is there really anything important happening? There is an election, I guess, but I don't perceive anything unique to the year 2000 with regards to trend/culture.
Given the choice, would you rather stake your life on your
ability to quickly solve a complex mathematical equation, or attempt to fight/escape from a large grizzly bear? Why?
Tom Ackerman: I'm poorly equipped for both. Give me marijuana and the math or meth-amphetamine and the bear...
What's your favorite video/computer game? Don't have one? How about board games?
Tom Ackerman: Scrabble and monopoly for both questions...
If you could elect to never, ever, ever have to kiss one particular
person now living, who would that person be?
Tom Ackerman: The pope? I don't know...
What's your position on gun control?
Tom Ackerman: People should shoot gun lobbyists.
What album or albums in your music collection would you
have to replace immediately if they wore out, were stolen, etc.?
Tom Ackerman: I always lose records. There are always others.
Do you use Napster (or any of its variants)? How often?
For what? If not, why not?
Tom Ackerman: Yes, every few days or so to hear a song that I heard on the radio but don't want to buy the record.
You are able to get away with murder once, and only once.
Who, if anyone, do you kill?
Tom Ackerman: Fred Durst.
Paper or plastic? Why?
Tom Ackerman: Paper. I hate how they always assume you want plastic by reaching for it first while they're asking you. Also, easier to store/recycle.
You're stuck at my house. It's your turn to cook. What meal do you cook me?
Tom Ackerman: Spaghetti. With sauce from the store. No garlic bread. Shut up and eat.
If you could make a rock 'n' roll porn movie, who
would be your two co-stars?
Tom Ackerman: The lead singer of Kittie (w/ black hair) and Kathleen Hanna.
What's the most evil thing in the world?
Tom Ackerman: Pop culture. Religion. Money. Me.
You have the power to bring one famous dead person back to
life. Who's it gonna be?
Tom Ackerman: John Lennon, mostly so that he would continue to do lame things with Yoko and not be so revered.
What was the last pet name used by you to refer to your someone special?
What was the last pet name your someone special used to refer to you?
Tom Ackerman: Hun, short for honey. Coach.
Was Betsy Ross hot for George Washington?
Tom Ackerman: No. Everybody knows Thomas Jefferson was the man.
What "official version" of a historical event do you most
suspect to be a load of crap?
Tom Ackerman: JFK.
What was the "most wanted" item on your holiday wish list?
Tom Ackerman: Playstation 2.
· · · · · · ·
Tom Ackerman plays drums and provides some vocals for Polyvinyl Records' Sunday's Best...who, having finished touring behind Poised to Break, appear to be in hiding.
-- George Zahora
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