Go to the Side One Dummy website, and the first thing you'll see is a dictionary's definition of "punk", in which punks are said to have "unusual clothing, hairstyles and makeup". For purists who give their props to Mr Webster, Madcap's dress code -- mohawks, earrings, raggedy clothing -- might be the only thing that makes the Los Angeles band "punk". Yeah, they don't look too different from "generic" punkers, but still, they look odd enough. Your parents would stare!

But assuming you want a bit more than a Billy Idol grimace, a first glance suggests Madcap might not please you purists. Their music is not at all subversive (nor are their feigned British accents surprising), and their passionately-sung lyrics often make the lamest declarations. The rousing chorus to "Downtown" ("I go down to the city/Even when the rain falls down!") basically means they don't mind walking with an umbrella; purists who don't equate punk with Mary Poppins have reason to scoff.

And yet, dumbass purists, what makes a punk song, a punk rocker, a punk attitude? Aside from aggression, subversion and stuff like that, don't you think sticking it to your fans and friends is one good way? For example, weren't the Jesus and Mary Chain "punk" for playing concerts with their backs to the audiences? I certainly think so. They were punk assholes, to be more precise, but definitely punk. Madcap don't make like Jesus and Mary Chain, at least not to my knowledge, but they do stick it to fans. And, to show that they're old-school, like almost all new punk groups (Atom and His Package being a major exception), Madcap punk us the good old Malcolm McLaren way.

Stand Your Ground is 100 percent swindle, punk crafted so perfectly for its intended audience that the band deserves comparison to Babyface and that conglomerate of teen band writers. They craft chants so expertly that their goofy goodwill ("This scene has a purpose...to unify each other with colorblind ideals") is exhilarating, and the hooks make all these songs worthy of endless replay. There is so little that is honest here, so little anger that seems genuine -- but no matter what aberrations of logic the band may scream in "Church and State" ("We Don't Care for Democracy! And I'm glad we're free to say it!"), or elsewhere, the only thing I could ever remember is that I liked the song, and I wanted to hear it again. I consider Stand Your Ground a masterpiece of SWINDLES because Madcap have given to punk rock fans the essence of all they're against -- commercial, manipulative product without heart -- and proved with a perfect string of consistency that it can be undeniably delightful. This record will make you shout "To hell with real blood and sweat, let's bring on songcraft inspired by demographic charts, commercial jingles and everything we love to hate!"